My Relationship with My Parents
I know God is interceding here with this one… I couldn’t get myself to writing yesterday because my dad just went back to California after spending 5 months with me due to medical issues. So this hits home hard.
I LOVE my dad, I’ll start there. He is the most free spirited man I’ve ever met in my entire life. He’s a jolly, go lucky type of guy, walks around without a care in the world. He’s also very sensitive, I got my sensitivity from him and I wish I would’ve inherited his free spirit as well. He is a fine cook! I love eating my dads food! He is not you’re typical family man type of guy, I don’t remember my dad ever playing with us as kids, I don’t remember my dad watching me from the sidelines when I played volleyball nor marching with the band when I was in drill team. I don’t remember eating dinner with him at the table after school in the evenings. I don’t remember him helping me with my homework or asking me how my day went at school.
There are many things I don’t remember about my dad. I do however, remember occasions on a one time basis, like taking me to Burger King for an apple pie I was drooling over just thinking of it at the time, I remember that like it was yesterday. I also remember him finally giving in to buying me a hot pink binder with pretty dividers, I cried over in the grocery store aisle where they had all the school supplies. It was the most beautiful binder I had ever seen! Although there are many things I don’t understand about my father’s ways, what I do understand and know is that he is the man the Lord chose to be my earthly father and although I feel I was deprived from my father’s love, affection, time, support, I love him with all my heart and soul. The best way I can describe my relationship with my dad is a “Love/Hate” relationship where love dominates regardless of how much hurt I feel at times when I think of all I need and want from my dad.
I had to describe him a bit first, so that my relationship with him would easily be illustrated and smoothly intertwine with the story. My dad has become an amazingly loving grandfather to all of his grandchildren and that fills in some of the holes in my heart. I will end by saying, I love my dad and still hope for a father/daughter relationship with my dad.
My relationship with my mom is amazing! My mom has been with me through thick and thin. She is my rock and her strength and ability to raise 4 kids practically on her own, boggles my mind! As a mother of two and having full support of my husband, I sympathize and hurt just thinking of all that she endured during those critical years as a new mom trying to make ends meet on her own. I remember coming home as a child from school and sitting on top of her sewing machine, this woman of steel had big ole’, industrial sewing machines. She worked for the big department stores and as she sewed her life away, I would sit and talk with her about my entire day, at school… from beginning to end. I still remember the heat of the lamp light she needed to carefully thread the needle and needles when she worked on her over lock sewing machine.
As long as I can remember, my mom was always bent over a sewing machine in our home. She took care of us, like a hen cares for her chicks, I hope I don’t offend anyone by making this analogy but it is the most purest, loving way I can describe it. She hovered over us like her most priced possessions the Lord gifted her with.
As the years have gone by my mom has changed in ways that I feel have to do with the hardship she endured. At times I don’t see eye to eye with her and tend to forget what she’s been through and the reasoning behind her ways now that she is older. I believe in total restoration through Gods grace and letting go of those chains that tie us down to strongholds developed throughout years of suffering and enduring difficult life situations. The difficulties I face at times in our mother/daughter relationship I believe is part of Gods work as he restores her and frees her from the chains she’s been carrying around. Without my mom, I wouldn’t be the person that I am right now and more importantly, without her I couldn’t continue growing and becoming the woman I know I am still to become. Her continued steady and strong walk in life, her LOVE and affection without limits for her grandchildren, her continued support for all of her four grown children never ceases. She surpasses the definition of being a mother. There aren’t enough words to describe the mother the Lord has blessed me with.
My mom is my heart, my rock, my constant, my blessing! I love my mom with every fiber in my body!
I’ve been crying and typing the entire time, as I’ve made my way back in time and back to the present. Hope everyone is enjoying writing as much as I am. Thanks Tara for this opportunity.