Category Archives: Sharlotte Jackson

#SocialChallenge Day 30: 10 Things to Remember About Me

10 Things to Remember About Me

There will come a time when I will no longer be here, hopefully in the distant, distant future. I want what most people want at the end, and that’s to be remembered. I want to be remembered for many things. I will share my top 10:

  1. Lover of God
  2. Follower of Christ
  3. Loving Daughter
  4. Wonderful Mother
  5. Excellent Wife
  6. Awesome Sister
  7. Best Aunt Ever
  8. Great Counselor
  9. Understanding Friend
  10. Servant to Others

My list is pretty modest. There are many more things I want to be remembered for. But most of all, I want to be remembered for making a difference in the lives that I have touched. What do you want to be remembered for?

#SocialChallenge Day 29: The Quiet Ones

The Quiet Ones

I am one of the quiet ones. Or so people think. Most people mistake my not speaking up at every opportunity as not having an opinion. I have opinions. I just don’t feel the need to share them all of the time.

Most people would mistake my quietness for weakness. Don’t get it twisted. I am as strong-willed as they come. I just choose to reserve my strength for when it is necessary use it. That is usually when someone is trying to pull the wool over my eyes. I just sit back and when the time is right, I lower the boom. And my no means no.

tarabuck_quiet_is_weakMost people assume since I’m quiet, I don’t have fun. I have plenty of fun. My type of fun doesn’t have to include alcohol or hanging at the club. Side Note: If the only way you can have fun is with a drink in your hand, you may have a problem. I like hanging out with family and friends. We can have a blast anywhere.

Most people assume that because I’m quiet, I’m not making any moves. Believe me, I’m making moves just fine. I don’t have to announce everything I do. When I want you to know something or need help, I know how to communicate.

Don’t underestimate the quiet ones. They just might surprise you.

 

#SocialChallenge Day 28: My Love Language

Love Language

It sounds so romantic doesn’t it? Let me give you a little background on love languages. Your love language is the way you express love as defined by Gary Chapman. Usually the way you express love is the way you like to receive it. Some people express love through touch or words of affirmation. Others express love through gifts or acts of service. Personally, I express love through quality time.

tarabuck_quality_timeBelieve it or not, I’m not big on fancy gifts. I don’t really need words of affirmation, but I wouldn’t turn them down either. I really enjoy spending quality time with loved ones. Now, hubby is a gifts person. He is also big on words of affirmation. My oldest is like me, she loves spending time with you, but she’s not turning down gifts either. I think my youngest is a fan of physical touch.

The trick with love languages is to not only know your love language, but also the love languages of others in your family. Why? Because it allows you to have better communication when you speak the other person’s language. It lets them know you care. People just want to know that you get it. So if your partner’s love language is quality time, but all you do is bring home trinkets, your mate will likely feel unappreciated. So take the time to learn your love language as well as your mate and children.

If you don’t know your love language, here is the website.

You can take the quiz to determine your love language. You can even learn the love languages of your mate and children. Do you know your love language? Drop your comments below.

 

#SocialChallenge Day 27: The Beauty of a Sound Mind

The Beauty of a Sound Mind

I was asked to answer the question what is your favorite body part and why? Here’s my answer: the brain. tarabuck_brain_labeled The brain controls everything. Your feelings, thoughts, and actions all happen in the brain. The more good stuff you put into it, the better you tend to be. Wonderful inventions and innovations come from the mind.

But I have seen what happens when the brain is not functioning properly. I used to work in nursing homes. Many of my clients were stroke victims or had some form of dementia. I also used to work in a partial hospitalization program where many of the patients had schizophrenia. Can you imagine having so many voices in your head or not being able to remember having children? What if you thought everyone was out to get you or you couldn’t remember what the function of a key is? That’s what it can be like with some forms of mental illness.

I like the fact that at this time I have a sound mind. My brain is pretty functional. Hopefully that will continue to be the case for many years to come. I like being able to live on my own independently. One of the issues many of my clients had to face was the loss of autonomy due to the impairments in their brain. Which is why I do what I can to stay mentally sharp.

So now I toss the question to you. What is your favorite part of your body and why?

#SocialChallenge Day 26: What the World Gets Wrong: I’m a Victim

What the World Gets Wrong: I’m a Victim

Have you ever heard of victim stance? Victim stance is always seeing yourself as the victim in every situation including situations you created. In today’s society, it seems like everybody is a victim. The ex-con who complains that no one will give him a job says he’s a victim. The drug addict who lost her kids says the system is stacked against her. The teenager who skipped school and failed claims the teachers just don’t understand him.

The problem is in none of these situations is the person a victim. Each of them placed themselves in situations that resulted in adverse consequences. These may be extreme examples, but everyone at some point plays the victim. Ever been pulled over for speeding, then complained about getting a ticket? That’s victim-stancing.

tarabuck_victimcard

One of the most egregious forms of victim-stancing is the belief that because I am a minority, I am automatically a victim. I am not. I had the opportunity to go to school and made the most of it. There is no man holding me down at work. I have been blessed by God with talents and abilities and I use them. I take responsibility for my actions. If something isn’t going right, I don’t waste time making excuses. We live in America and opportunities are all around. I refuse to lay claim to being a victim.

#SocialChallenge Day 25: Dinner with Billy Graham

Dinner with Billy Graham

billy_grahamI am aware of my spiritual gifts. Evangelism is not it. I grew up watching Billy Graham on TV. It used to amaze me how God would work through him. Billy Graham would always give a clear and consistent message. He was genuine. It’s a shame that he has retired. I would love the opportunity to hear him in person. It would be even better if I could sit down and have a meal with him. I would even be willing to cook.

Mr. Graham is a good old southern boy. I’m sure he would appreciate a nice home cooked meal. The meal would include fried chicken, ham, greens, mashed potatoes, corn, sweet potatoes, and cornbread (wouldn’t be complete without it). For dessert, pound cake with lemon icing. Doesn’t that sound just divine?

We would be able to discuss his work and what he hopes to come. We would discuss his past adventures and trips to foreign lands. I would most want to know the struggles he has faced. It can’t be easy trying to raise a family and be on the road all the time. It must have been even harder on the kids. Also, what did it take to maintain the marriage for so long? Everybody wants to know that secret.

After a great meal and long discussion, it would be nap time. Trust me, eating all of that would put anybody to sleep. Even though there are many more people I would like to meet, Mr. Graham is at the top of my list. Who is at the top of your list?

#SocialChallenge Day 24: Families: The More Things Change…

Families: The More Things Change…

Did you know people often marry people like their parents? Sometimes people actively seek out mates similar to their parents. Sometimes they do it without realizing it. People gravitate to what is familiar, whether good or bad. Think of your childhood and compare it to the family you have built now.

When I think of my childhood, I remember never going hungry. I also remember that there was not a lot of love shared. I know we loved each other, but there was just not enough affection or healthy expressions of love. Everybody kind of did their own thing. I also remember my father used to rough house with us until we got too big to pick up. After that there weren’t many hugs and kisses. My dad would usually wait until there were big accomplishments before he would let us know he was proud. My mother suffered from depression. She would make sure we got to where we needed to go, but she wasn’t much for showing affection either.

When I was a kid I swore things would be different. I was going to be the best mom ever. I was going to make sure my kids never lacked for affection. Then I grew up and had kids. Suddenly my perspective changed. Kids are exhausting. They need you all the time at first, they want constant attention, and they have way too much energy. While hubby is more affectionate and involved with the kids than my father was, I’ve noticed he doesn’t rough house as much as when they were younger. I guess that’s normal. As for me, I make a conscience effort to spend time with my babies. Even though I may be exhausted, I never want my kids to feel that they aren’t loved. The last thing I need is for them to start looking for love in all the wrong places.

Now that you’ve had time to think about your family, what differences have you noticed? What do you do differently now that you’re a parent?

 

#SocialChallenge Day 23: My 5 Hobbies

Aren’t hobbies wonderful.

Hobbies give us an opportunity to pursue interests outside of what we usually do. They give a break and usually allow us to be creative. If you’re lucky, your hobby can put a little cash in your pocket. For example, I know a guy who draws blueprints for tiny houses as a hobby and sells they to builders. I may be busy, but I have some hobbies of my own. I’ll tell you about 5.

 

1. Candle-making – I love candles. So what better way to get my candle fix than by making them on my own. There is even a supplier in my area. How awesome is that? I love mixing colors and making little candles as party favors. Not that I’m super all-natural organic girl, but I prefer making candles from soy wax. They don’t leave as much soot when they burn.

2. Calligraphy – I have horrible handwriting. I got my first D ever in handwriting. People would joke that I was going to be a doctor one day because of how horrible it is. So I took up calligraphy thinking it would improve my handwriting. It didn’t. But I can do awesome calligraphy when I put my mind to it. There are calligraphy guilds all across the country. If you’re ever interested in learning, you should join.

3. Reading – I love to read. And with the advent of the Kindle, no need to carry around books. I usually read books on psychology, self improvement and sometimes manga.

4. TV – I actually need to cut down on this hobby. Thank God for DVR. That way I can record my favorite shows and when I’m done getting everybody settled I can watch my shows in peace. Usually I wait until the end of the week and watch my shows then. Where was DVR when I was a kid?

5. Cooking – I can honestly admit I love to cook. I think I like the experimentation that comes with cooking. There have been massive successes and epic failures when I have tried new recipes. But that’s part of the fun. I especially like to cook for the big holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas. That’s usually when I will try to break out a new recipe. Hey, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Now that you know my hobbies, what are some of yours? Be sure to drop comments below.

#SocialChallenge Day 22: My 5, 10, and 15 Year Plan

The Future

I believe in making plans. However, God has this funny way of chucking my plans and replacing them with His own. So I think today I’m going to give God a laugh and let Him know what my plans are with the full knowledge that He is going to work His will. And if my plans don’t fit in with His plans, guess who’s going to win? It won’t be me. So let the laughs begin.

5 Year Plan

In 5 years I am working independently. I have a successful practice and also help young therapists launch their own practices. I now have three kids. The hubby is running a successful pool cleaning business and is his own boss as well. I have also fulfilled a lifelong goal of going on a mission trip.

10 Year Plan

The kids are halfway out the house. I own several practices in various parts of the city. I now buy struggling therapy practices and turn them around. The hubby now has a team of employees so he doesn’t have to work as hard. We are almost out of debt and the house is almost paid off. Downside is, the kids are now teenagers and the oldest is getting ready to graduate. Few more years, we’ll have an empty nest.

15 Year Plan

Business is going well, and we have one more kid to go before we are empty nesters. We are completely debt free and we have been on several mission trips. We get to travel more now. We support several non-profits anonymously. I’ve never liked the idea of being flashy with philanthropy.

See? My plans are pretty modest. I am working on dreaming bigger. But in the mean time what are your plans for the future?

 

#SocialChallenge Day 21: Oh, To Be Able To Get Away

Super powers are awesome.

I grew up watching Justice League and X-Men. I used to watch Storm control the weather and Wolverine heal himself in an instant. I used to watch Superman fly and Flash move with the speed of lightning. I was envious.

tarabuck_teleportingYet of all the superpowers, I wish I could teleport. If I could snap my fingers and be anywhere in the world, that would be magnificent. I would travel the world in a flash. No long lines at the airport. No invasive security checks. No crying babies on airplanes. Oh, the life.

But you know what else I wouldn’t have to worry about? Traffic. I don’t know what type of traffic you face, but the type of traffic I face is horrific. It shouldn’t take 1 hour to travel less than 20 miles. And to make matters worse, they want to do construction during rush hour. Can’t win for losing.

Also think of the cost savings. If I could teleport, who needs to worry about burning gas? Heck, who would even need a car? No need for car insurance or oil changes. It gets better and better.

Come to think of it. Teleportation probably wouldn’t help my procrastination. Knowing me, I would probably wait until the very last minute to get ready to go somewhere. But then again, I would still be able to get there on time because I could teleport.

Then there are those awkward situations. You know the ones from those Southwest commercials where at the end the announcer asks “Wanna just get away?” I have been in those situations on more than one occasion. If I could have just snapped my fingered to be on a beach in Cabo, I would’ve in a heartbeat.
Unfortunately, life isn’t really like that. Nobody has those types of abilities. But isn’t it nice to dream? If you had a super power, what would yours be?